• hh93@lemm.ee
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    2 years ago

    Wouldn’t it be more realistic if Barbie was also Ken? Since most catfishs are dudes going for dudes?

    Or is the meme referring to something else?

    • Baby Shoggoth [she/her]@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      2 years ago

      Yes, the meme is referring to something else.

      For some reason, cishet american men on dating apps love to put a picture of themselves holding up a fish they caught while fishing as one of their dating profile pics.

      Nobody really knows why that’s supposed to attract a potential dating partner, but it’s really common.

      • Voyajer@lemmy.world
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        2 years ago

        We just don’t have a lot of photos of ourselves, I’d imagine even less selection if you only count recent photos since that’s probably what you would want to put on a dating profile.

      • hh93@lemm.ee
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        2 years ago

        Ah

        I’d guess it should send a “see how I can provide for food even without using money” kind of way?

        But yeah it’s stupid

        • squiblet@kbin.social
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          2 years ago

          It’s more a “I’m a manly dude who is good at catching fish! I enjoy leisure time on lakes and I have a boat!” than a promise that they’ll eat the fish. At least half the time it’s catch and release fishing anyway.

          • Baby Shoggoth [she/her]@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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            2 years ago

            Honestly i think it’s much more realistic that most cishet men don’t take pictures of themselves often. But they do when they catch a fish, because that’s what fishy people do. It’s a dick-measuring contest amongst men where the dick being measured is “how big of a fish can i catch?”.

            So it’s one of the only pictures you have of yourself, because men don’t tend to just take pictures of themselves just hanging out, there has to be a manly reason for men to take pictures of each other.

            Also, often, men go out and fish together to get away from and complain about their partners, and usually, these fish pics come with a bunch of your friends going 👀😍🤯 at your fish.

            And even if you’re not all of those negative things, it makes you far from unique. every boring cookie-cutter dude has a fish pic. look, i caught a fish, i am manly so i can provide for you with some average trout i found in a lake.

            also, if this many men think “fishing is my most dating-profile worthy passion”, it says a lot. It doesn’t make you special because a good third of men on dating apps share that passion, and it honestly makes me expect a dick pic from you if i even bother matching with you. Maybe try showing off your other passions too?

            • Letstakealook@lemm.ee
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              2 years ago

              You can just admit you have a general disdain for men. Maybe after admitting that, do yourself and all men a favor, and just leave men alone, lol.

              • Baby Shoggoth [she/her]@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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                2 years ago

                I don’t have a general disdain for men. I do have a general disdain for toxic masculinity. There’s a huge difference between the two.

                Look, you wanna put your fish pic in your dating profile? Go ahead. but it’s not impressive. Plenty of other men have bigger fish pics on their profile, and they’re equally unimpressive to anyone who isn’t into fishing.

                I’ve never met another woman who had anything positive to say about a man on a dating site with fish pictures. Met plenty of other women who are equally as confused as i am about fish pics. Never even anyone saying “look how cute he is being proud of catching some fish of some size, isn’t he cute?”.

                fishing isn’t a substitute for a personality.

                • Letstakealook@lemm.ee
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                  2 years ago

                  Your entire comment you posted is just shitting on men and attributing the worst possible reasons you can imagine to them posting a fish photo. You continue in your second response to shit on men just because you don’t enjoy a particular hobby some have.

          • 0ops@lemm.ee
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            2 years ago

            Honestly, is it so hard to believe that some people genuinely like fishing?

          • WarmSoda@lemm.ee
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            2 years ago

            Agreed.

            The alternative is probably a picture of the dude writing slurs in a comment section.

      • ArbitraryValue@sh.itjust.works
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        2 years ago

        Nobody really knows why that’s supposed to attract a potential dating partner, but it’s really common

        Back when I did online dating I wrote about playing computer games, not because I expected that to be attractive to the average woman (of course it isn’t) but because I was hoping to meet one of the rare women who shared my interest.

        A friend of mine managed to marry a woman who agreed to have their honeymoon be a week-long canoe trip through the wilderness in Maine, complete with living off of the fish they caught. It can happen!

      • bstix@feddit.dk
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        2 years ago

        I can see it working to filter out incompatible partners.

        Attraction… maybe for someone looking for a certain kind of partner.

      • MasterBlaster@lemmy.world
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        2 years ago

        As someone who does not use dating apps, it seems to me that a lot of men who are not city dwellers get lots of joy out of fishing. It seems rather insulting to demean someone for showing one of their favorite activities to potential mates. To those who would do that, I would ask why not simply move on quietly?

        Now that I think of it, those men are dodging bullets like Neo. Smart guys. If I ever decide to put myself out there, I’m putting up pictures of myself at a campground with a fishing rod and bicycle in the background. That should weed out any women who expect four star resorts, expensive restaurants, and expensive toys for their mere presence.

        • Baby Shoggoth [she/her]@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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          2 years ago

          I think you’re misunderstanding the point of the whole meme, and by extension, what i have been saying. It may be more common for country dwellers, but it’s also incredibly common for city dwellers.

          There is also never a woman in any of these pics. It’s usually a dude with a bunch of other dudes. I understand that it might be your hobby, and there’s nothing wrong with that being your hobby.

          But if it’s a hobby you only share with other dudes and not your partners, and it’s the only hobby on your dating profile, and it’s the most common “only hobby i have pictures of myself doing” for men on dating sites, then at least one of the following isnt probably true:

          1. you’re not differentiating yourself from any other dude in my inbox
          2. you’re showing off to me that, even if you do have other hobbies, you’re probably not going to take pictures of me/us doing them, and i’m not even sure if you have any hobbies that i would be into, if i am not into fishing
          3. you don’t think any other hobbies are important enough for a partner to care about, except fishing
          4. you don’t take a lot of pictures of yourself having fun in general. the only reason that fish pic was taken is because you were proud of it in a way that your other masculine friends could take a picture of you without making fun of you

          again, i’m speaking from experience on dating apps, and from anecdotes from other women i know. It is incredibly common (i would guess, as a city girl, who only matches with other people in my city, and not surrounding rural areas, at least 20-40%) for a picture of you fishing with your guy friends to be the only picture of you doing anything you enjoy.

          Even if that’s your primary hobby, there’s dozens of other dudes in my inbox for whom that is their only hobby that they care enough to take pictures of.

          Otherwise you’re just showing me 3-4 face (and/or, for some reason, shirtless) pics and a pic of you fishing with your bros. It’s not appealing, and it’s far from unique. You’ve also not shown me anything we can do together, and your profile mentions nothing else either.

          And no, i’m not looking for a man to take me to four star restaurants or whatever else you think i’m after. I make good enough money to cover my needs and hobbies and treat both myself and my partner with nice stuff and experiences. I want someone who is going to spend time with me, with whom i share hobbies, interests, and ideals.

          • MasterBlaster@lemmy.world
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            2 years ago

            I have a serious question for you. If a man is looking for a woman on a dating site, why would he post a bunch of pictures with women? I mean, it seems like it would raise more issues.

            Do you want to see other women in his pictures to show that he is dateable? Maybe you want to compare yourself to his past relationships? As a man, I would not post pictures of me with women when I’m looking for a woman. The whole point is to highlight me and my eligibility, not raise questions of whether I’m a womanizer looking for my next conquest.

            Then again, maybe that’s what you’re looking for? Someone who’s cool, and has lots of women hanging around him? I don’t know.

            However, I do agree that if all he has on the profile is fishing, he’s probably not doing much else. I’d include a whole lot more stuff.

            Funny thing is, what you say you seek is what I used to seek, but somehow I always ended up broke and overworked when i was with women. Maybe you’re one of the good ones I never found. Oh, well.