A genocidal maniac getting to off himself in a secret bunker isn’t what I’d call justice.

Anhedonic Sugar Cookie

Can you tell me what continent your friend lives on? I need to make plans to either never go there or move immediately.

Giant Red Panda

Or the poor adults who can’t be bothered to parent their own spawn.

Everybody’s gettin’ webshots.

Some folks have to learn the hard way.

1. Don’t type in code from the internet that you don’t understand.
2. Always have a backup.
3. Sometimes you’re going to bork your system. Know when to reinstall, restore and move on.

Cum if she wants to. Cum around the world.

Conan O’Brien as Desmond Tutu.

I’m just trying give her that system-d.

They’re not voting for Republicans. They’re voting against Democrats. And, no, they will never learn.

My 6 month old wrote my masters dissertation about the effects of plagiarism on the academic integrity of preschool PhD programs. She’s brilliant and meta.

… when a hand loves a woman very much …

I sometimes wonder what happened to all the boxed mattresses - Casper, Purple, Helix. They all just seem to have vanished into thin air.

That’s the wide maniacal smile of someone who revels in the thought of carving you like a decorative soap.

Throw the trolley off the side of the ferry.

The downvotes are because your “solution” is not based in the reality that the rest of us live in.

I wiped with a CD instead.

This is assuming that each inmate who threatened to kill him did so only once.

“…in excess of $50k.” This language is defined by the Florida Wrongful Death statute and means at least $50,001 but can be much more.