World skiing’s governing body has moved swiftly to quash talk of ski jumpers injecting their penises with paraffin or hyaluronic acid to gain a competitive edge, but scientists and ski jumpers at the Winter Olympics say if true, it would make perfect sense.
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“The more surface area they have — the more surface they expose while in the air — the farther they go,” Marco Belloli, director of the mechanics department at Milan’s Politecnico University, told Reuters.
The jokes write themselves.
One this I’m not modest about is my naturally aerodynamic penis.
Aerodynamics isn’t what you want for ski jumping though. You need a wide, meaty, hog to catch more air.
Then I won’t enjoy skiing anymore
